Mega P V G

Title:  Mega Python vs. Gatoroid

Actors/Director/Anything Worth Mentioning Right Away:  After starring in movies of the same caliber both made by The Asylum prior to this, former pop sensations (and Jordan Knight lovers) Debbie Gibson and Tiffany finally come to blows.   It’s like if MC Hammer was in a movie versus Vanilla Ice only with women.

Introduction:  One of my most complex movies in the “how I got it” sense to date.   First off, this movie originally premiered on SyFy.   I don’t have cable, so I couldn’t watch it on television.   I anxiously awaited the DVD release, bothering everyone that I could about it until finally… one day… I was pet sitting and saw that it was replaying on SyFy at a day I’d be able to watch it on someone else’s television.  I later, through the power of Netflix, found out that the Saturday I could watch it on television was just mere days before the movie finally came out on DVD.   I decided to forgo the commercials and put it in my Netflix queue.  Then, at last, it was released on Tuesday, June 21^st, 2011… and it had a very long wait on Netflix.   So, while at Walmart I checked to see the price and it was a mere ten dollars.  Knowing I’d be supporting movies I enjoy and for how long I wanted to see this movie (Plus because I’d inevitably end up buying it anyway) I purchased this movie the Saturday the week of its release.   It should also be noted that it was one of two copies left on the… whatever Walmart uses to showcase their DVDs.   They’re not really shelves or pegs, but you get the idea.

Location:  This movie takes place within the same town, but there are various locations throughout the town, so I’d say they had somewhat of a decent budget.

Plot:  As far as plots go, this movie isn’t too heavy on the details.  It actually kind of plays out like most of the other movies made in this genre, but that doesn’t make it any less fun to watch.   For whatever reason, pythons are getting huge and killing people (and dogs).   So Tiffany’s character decides to stuff chickens with steroids and feed them to the gators to form a sort of super gator to hopefully wipe out the giant python problem.   Realistically, this plot probably dates back to Biblical times, but I can at least trace it as far back as Godzilla movies, such as the invention of Mecha Godzilla to combat the more evil of the two ‘Zillas.   Meanwhile, Debbie Gibson’s character leads a group of animal rights protestors who think there should be a better way to deal with this problem.  In fact, she says something to the very fact that nature should be able to work itself out, to which Tiffany’s character replies:  “Pythons aren’t the top of the food chain, I AM!” (One of my single favorite quotes in the entire movie)  Eventually, with the help of a voodoo doctor and Mickey Dolenz, the girls work together and try to make this problem go away with dynamite and pheromones.    Wow, I really did just type that sentence.   In the end, both of the former pop divas meet their demise (to the pleasing of all the viewers) and only a few survive that were in the beginning of the movie.   The one question I always had about this movie- monsters aside- was who would die and who would live between the two main women.   I was actually pleased to see both die because any other option would’ve just felt like a rip off.

Acting:  To say that this movie is overacted would be an understatement.   In their first real scene together, Debbie Gibson grabs Tiffany, to which Tiffany exclaims something like: “Don’t touch me!”  That’s the first sign of how this movie will be and honestly it adds a lot of humor, intentional or not.   Later on in the movie (But not too much later) Tiffany’s boyfriend dies and the whole reaction scene to that as well as the two women yelling about it turns into something like a cross between Jerry Springer and I have no idea what.   Needless to say, IT IS HILARIOUS.

Production:  It’s a made for SyFy movie made by The Asylum.  Use your imagination.

Sex/Nudity:  Since this was made for SyFy by The Asylum, you know that’s a no.

Special Effects:  While I realize that the pythons were not real, they still looked very realistic.   Movies of this type tend to lean more toward the side of special effects that are obviously fake, but this movie didn’t do that.  Maybe it’s because it’s not that hard to make a CGI snake because snakes are real, but this movie actually did look pretty realistic and I tip my hat to them for that.

Overall Verdict:  This is not the first movie that I have been given weird looks when buying.   In fact, the Walmart cashier didn’t seem to mind as much as the lady standing next to her who was probably also a cashier but just too lazy to do her job.  What’s funny is, when we walked up to the cash register, with no one else in line, the lady who was telling the story finished it up quickly in Spanish, which I just thought was hilarious.   Don’t ever let the gringos know what you’re talking about.  You work at Walmart, how cool of a story can it really be?  Then when the cashier put the DVD in the bag, the other lady took it back out to look at it.   Yes, the lady talking trash in Spanish who works at Walmart is judgmental of the movies that I buy.  She probably owns the Nicholas Sparks boxed set, so forget her.    I really like the movies that The Asylum has been putting out recently and this is no exception.   This is definitely somewhat of a monster movie at heart, it is a B movie in ways that it may have intended, but mostly this movie is a comedy.   I will watch it again and again.   Also, as an added note, the title of my review is how the DVD title appeared on my Walmart receipt.   Pretty cool, huh?